"Me and My Shadow" - Sermon from July 10, 2011

The Fourth Sunday after Pentecost

July 10, 2011

“Me and My Shadow”

by Rev. Dr. Larry Bethune

Psalm 119:105-112

Genesis 25:19-34

*Romans 8:1-11

Matthew 13:1-9

 “Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable to you, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.” – Psalm 19:14Here's a famous optical illusion. Do you see twin faces or a chalice? Y’all know I love gargoyles. I have hundreds of pictures from my visits to cathedrals. Two of my favorites are on the north side of the Washington National Cathedral. There the stonemason carved his twin grandsons. One is “nice” with a halo on his head and a schoolbook in his hand. The other is “naughty” with a broken halo and his hand in a cookie jar! When asked to name which was which, stonemason Carl Bush refused to say!Speaking of dynamic duos, what’s with all the twins in our church? Have you noticed? Michael and Grace, Gage and Ella, Zack and Zoe, Beckett and Braxton. Two by two by two by two - it’s like Noah’s ark around here! We have four sets of twins in the congregation right now, which are a lot for a church our size. I’m a father of twins, and I know several of you have doppelgangers, too. This is a great blessing to us all! Of course, none of them is naughty; they are all nice!The Bible has two references to twins. In the New Testament Jesus’ disciple Thomas is also called “Didymus,” which means “twin” in Greek. Some scholars say he must have had a shadow sibling, while others suggest it refers to his inner dual nature, how he is always of a divided mind.The other reference to twins is our Hebrew scripture today, the story of Esau and Jacob. A number of Jewish commentators insist they represent two personality “types” but others say they represent the duality within each of us. So both biblical twin references would seem to share this metaphor of inner division.The story reads like a Tennessee Williams southern soap opera. Esau is a man's man, a rough, hairy outdoorsman, sort of a redneck, comes off a little dull-witted. First he “sells his birthright for a mess of pottage.” And then when Big Momma helps Bubba Jacob trick him out of Big Daddy Isaac’s blessing, he moves to kill Bubba Jacob.Jacob is named “Grabber” because he’s born grabbing his brother’s heel. And he’s a grabber ever after, a crafty scoundrel wheeling and dealing to get what he wants. Takes advantage of his brother’s hunger to get the birthright. Tricks his dad into giving him the paternal blessing, even more critical than usual in the Bible story because this blessing includes God’s covenant promises to Abraham.Jacob runs for his life, but doesn’t learn his lesson about deceitful scheming. He and his uncle Laban game each other back and forth, with Jacob finally winning. When they part with “The Lord watch between you and me when we are absent one from the other” (Gen 31:49), it’s not a blessing but a “God’s watching you” curse! Several times Jacob even tries to wheel and deal with God.Mind you, the Jacob stories we will be hearing for the next few weeks are written by Jacob’s own descendants – his other name is “Israel,” “the God-wrestler!” So they are rather hard on brother Esau. Take the concluding comment in our story today: “Thus Esau despised his birthright.” What about Jacob not feeding his starving brother without demanding a Faustian bargain?But the tradition, however biased, still reports Jacob’s shenanigans, while also recognizing Esau’s beneficence at the end. And in the last analysis, both of them are blessed. In other words, it’s too simplistic to say one is good and the other is bad. And that is true of the twin nature in each of us.You remember when we were kids, the devil on one shoulder and the angel on the other pulling some cartoon character in different ways? And they always went with the devil. Well, we all know that pull, don’t we? In fact, most of us hear more than two urgent voices in our heads. As the old poem suggests: 

Within my earthly temple there's a crowd.

There's one of us that's humble, one that's proud.

There's one who's broken-hearted for his sins.

There's one who unrepentant sits and grins.

There's one who loves his neighbor as himself.

And one who cares for naught but fame and pelf.

From such perplexing care I would be free.

If I could once determine which is Me! (Anonymous)

 You might say the struggle with our inner multiplicity is caused by all the “versus” in our personal hymnals: conscious versus unconscious; reason versus emotion; material versus spiritual; masculine versus feminine; toughness versus tenderness, external versus internal; discipline versus pleasure; love versus selfishness; or to use Paul’s language, “flesh versus spirit.” These twin characteristics war constantly within our souls. The duals duel against each other. And like the proverbial angel versus devil, we usually label one as good and the other as bad or weak or evil, then try to suppress whatever we label “bad.” But it’s not that simple.Carl Jung referred to our repressed qualities and impulses as our “shadow aspect.” However we may deny that it is there, it remains and has this tendency to burst through our façade, take control at embarrassing moments, and get projected against others “turning a personal inferiority into a perceived moral deficiency in someone else.”Jung recognized what he called “the absolute shadow,” that there is evil in the world, and ignoring the evil that lies within us is both naïve and dangerous. Evil should be avoided.But not all of our shadow side is evil. It may just be abnormal or different. And that’s where our creativity and individuality lie, because creativity always means “coloring outside the lines,” something beyond what has been the standard norm. The shadow side offers richness and depth beyond our tight self-control and conformity to other’s expectations.For Jung, the goal of growth is to recognize our unconscious shadow side and integrate it into healthy balance with our conscious “good” side. Like overcoming the shame I mentioned last week, embracing our shadow side takes humility, honesty, courage, and patience. It also takes an integrating center.Take the optical illusion. Do you see twin faces or a chalice? Imagine one of the faces removed. No twin, no chalice. The truth is most of the qualities of our dueling natures are not “good” or “bad,” but have a potential to be either. I had a seminary friend years ago who had a terrible temper. I mean, he was a hothead! He got beet-red-bulging-vein angry at the drop of a hat. Sooner or later, everybody who knew him got a burst of his fury. Needless to say, it wrecked his relationships and didn’t bode well for his career in ministry. So they urged him to “get help.”I saw him one day and he was beaming. “My therapist told me I’m lucky to be such a passionate guy,” he said. “I care more deeply than most, which is a good quality. I just need to be more careful how I express it.”I’m sure it was more complicated than that, and it took lots of practice. But he got better. Instead of trying to control, deny, or suppress his anger, he embraced it, sorted through it, and learned to turn it in a positive direction as a passionate caring energy. That’s how you find balance with your shadow side.We have a twin nature where it comes to God, too. Faith always stands in dynamic balance with doubt. You could hear that in the “God-is-near/God is distant” quotes from the psalms in our call to worship today.Or, to use Jesus’ parable of the soils, all the soils are in us. Some days we are receptive to God’s grace and sometimes we are not. When we are, the harvest is rich. But even when we are not, God spreads the grace liberally upon us anyway. Hey! Isn’t that good news?!Which brings me to the integrating center of our souls, the one who created our inner twin natures. He is the the chalice balancing our inner dualities. As we focus every part of ourselves upon him, we discover the cup of life, deep and rich. Do you know the two candles on the Christian altar represent the twin nature of Christ – humanity and divinity in perfect balance?He offers us the grace we need for this journey of inner reconciliation. His accepting love is the place where we start, forgiving ourselves so we can forgive others, offering an original blessing so we can bless and not curse others.Like the wheat that is ground and the grapes that are crushed, he brings the broken pieces of our lives into a nurturing whole. Like the bread which is shared and the cup which is poured he brings us into community with one another. With Christ at our center, we integrate our many selves, we balance our dual impulses, we commune together with God.So come to the table today, both of you, all of you, and let Christ guide you in your journey towards wholeness. Amen. May we pray?Lord, at this table you offer us grace and hope, balance and life. At this table we offer you ourselves entirely, our strengths and weaknesses, our faith and doubt, our successes and our failures, our will and our many impulses. Balance our paradox. Make our inner twins friends. Take the many selves within us and make us whole as we respond to your grace in Jesus’ name.Amen.